Thursday, April 4, 2013

turning 40 and being in a slump.....

So...yesterday I turned 40. I never imagined it would affect me the way it did. It's only a number really....but to me it seemed to be some sort of milestone...the age when you kind of sit back and assess just how far you have come and what you have accomplished. Though I have so much to be thankful for...two beautiful children, a wonderful husband, great friends and family...I still felt sad. It's not like me to dwell on things or become depressed (at least not for very long) but turning 40 just hit me hard. All I could think about was what I haven't accomplished....how I still haven't lost the extra pounds
I have been wanting to, how I still haven't found the success I was hoping for with my art, how I need to be a better parent...a better wife...have more patience...work harder in the studio... and on and on....I was really quite hard on myself over the last week. I felt so hopeless and really quite lonely.....but today I move ahead. I really have no right to be sad.....I have so much.


It really is just a number.....I certainly don't feel 40...whatever that means. I will enter into this next phase of my life with a positive attitude and a smile on my face. I have an amazing family, a cozy home, and a beautiful life. I can make it what I want...and I will. Wish me luck as I take on the next 40 years!